The Dean’s Office (Part 1)

I know movies can be dramatic and are designed to entertain us.

“This scene is unrealistic,”

“That is too much of a coincidence,”

“The world is too large for these two to keep meeting,”

These are some of the commentary my brain runs when I sit to watch movies.

I had never set my eyes on him until the dean introduced us during one of the faculty meetings. He was tall, fair and properly dressed in a coffee brown Italian, slim-fit suit, a white shirt underneath and brown shoes to match. He seemed to have good taste in fashion.

“Dr. Osei, meet Francis Smith(PhD). He is the newest addition to the Business School. He will lecture in Finance,” the dean said.

“Pleased to meet you, Dr. Smith,” I said with my hands lifted to meet his in a firm handshake.

The two of us sat across the dean to discuss the course structure. We were still going to lecture for ten weeks, conduct interim assessments, give the students one project work to be executed in a group and finally examine them at the end of semester.

“I am glad you will be working together to make this semester a successful one,” the dean said. “But Francis, keep it strictly professional. She is definitely not your type and she is married.”

The dean said while sharing a hearty laugh with Dr. Smith.

I couldn’t tell how far their friendship went but I was simply not interested in where this joke was headed.

I packed my notebook into my bag and quickly made my way to the door of the dean’s office.

“Let’s just say I haven’t grown out of my boyish desires,” I heard Dr. Smith respond with another loud laughter which rang through the office and was followed by another handshake.

This Francis guy or Dr. Smith was good looking and God knows he looked great in that suit. Many women would definitely kill to date him but who really is Dr. Francis Smith?

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My sense of style cannot be described as classy or chic or trendy. I dress to feel comfortable and on regular days, I wear my African print dresses and my natural hair is always pulled up in a bun.

Today, I am dressed in a crisp white long sleeves with a navy blue body con skirt and a three-inch high heel. This is how I dress whenever I needed to represent the Business School at meetings off-campus. The dean offered me his spot at a high level meeting with some government officials and I had to look, act and speak the part. No wonder most of the participants wanted to interact me right after the meeting.

I needed to grab some breakfast from the Senior Staff Cafeteria before heading over to the dean’s to debrief.

“There you are,”

A voice behind me made me turn and it belonged to no other than Dr. Smith. What do they say about coincidences again?

“Hi,”

“I haven’t set my eyes on you since we had that meeting at the dean’s office. We’re supposed to work together, you know,”

His eyes moved from my face, down to my little cleavage and they rested on my skirt before making their way to my eyes again.

“You could have have simply asked the dean for that information,” I said.

“You know, why don’t we sit at the table in the corner and have a little chat. The waitress could serve us,” he said.

“Second floor, Lecture Theatre 5, Room 7. You can find me there,” I said quickly while picking my meal and leaving the cafeteria.

…..to be continued

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To my Husband on our Fifth Wedding Anniversary

Dear Hubby,

On Saturday, we celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary and for once, since we got married, I felt the years have flown by quite quickly. Five years on and I see nothing but the goodness of the Lord all around us. Nothing has changed about how I feel about you. I still love you the same way I did five years ago when we stood at the altar to say our vows, if not more.

On this particular anniversary, I choose to celebrate the five year-friendship we shared before the wedding ceremony and how that has played an important role in our marriage. We are still comfortable in each other’s presence, we appreciate and are very much concerned about each other and also laugh and tease each other and are not afraid of the consequences. Indeed, the counselors do not lie when they say you should marry your friend.

Five years on, I see growth (not just in our sizes) but in how we relate with each other. I am glad we do not restrict ourselves but allow each other to explore in whichever field God places on our hearts. I know we are better versions of ourselves, thanks to this union.

Over time, I have come to understand how to relate with you so not to cause unnecessary arguments. This strategy, I call, ‘the watch and pray method’ which involves watching you closely, stating my opinion about the issue and when I know it is likely to generate an argument, I leave it there. I then commit the rest to God and watch you and mostly, these situations that I draw your attention to, end up changing with time and when they do change, I do not see them as a win for me but evidence that God listens to our prayers. What do they say about women having a sixth sense?

The past year, especially, has had its fair share of challenges but I am still excited about our future. I know God hasn’t even started with us. Five years on and I can’t think of anyone to call when there is any form of emergency (in my definition). This includes calling you to find out if the car can carry me to next fuel station when the fuel gauge of the car indicates ’empty.’

I am glad you insisted I was the one when we first met and persisted when you proposed to me. This is to celebrate more years of staying in love and this marriage and to fighting and winning loads of battles as a family.

Love,

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Letters: To Advise or Not to Advise (III)

Dear Ama,

We have received your letter and I was given the responsibility of providing you with the appropriate response.

After reading through your reply, the girls and I have decided to offer you a grace period and whether we accept you into our circle, will depend on the answers you provide.

You raised a few issues which boggled our minds, especially, with regards to the pieces of advice provided to you and Yaw during your marriage counselling sessions.

Did your counsellors really say you should cut off your friends and all external parties? All because you’re married? Are you really happy to do that? Will you follow through with this advice? You really scared us when you said you (the woman) will be blamed if something goes wrong in this union. 🤦🏾‍♀️

You also mentioned Yaw did not have a lot of friends. During the wedding, he did not strike us as an individual who kept to himself, looking at the number of groomsmen who followed him and his dance moves during the wedding. We all had the impression he was outgoing. Or is he currently following the advice of your marriage counsellors? 🤷🏿‍♀️

Your response to this letter is very crucial. It’ll inform the girls and I on our next step of action. We look forward to hearing from you.

The leader of the pack,

Joy

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