Birthday Musings

“Mummy, when will it be my birthday?”

This is a popular question my four-year-old daughter keeps asking almost every time she hears the word ‘birthday’ and I believe it comes with being born in November and seeing almost everyone celebrate theirs before yours.

When I was much younger, I anticipated my birthdays too and that got me giddy whenever it was approaching. Birthdays then, were more of a time to eat special meals and get extra money from my guardians. Years later, birthdays meant receiving and responding to wishes over the phone and on social media. Some of the messages on social media did make me feel exceptionally special and I never wanted the day to end.

About seven years ago, I deleted my birth date from Facebook, LinkedIn and all other social media platforms and I was stunned at how quiet my birthday was. I received birthday messages from two very close friends and my family. The two friends wrote messages on the Whatsapp group pages that we belonged to and that generated more wishes and that was it. I enjoyed the peace that came with that birthday and I left the settings on the social media pages as such. That gave birth to my new way of celebrating my birthdays.

My preference for quiet birthdays has even heightened the more as I grow and a cousin who also celebrates his birthday in June (a few days before mine) always comments,

“Birthdays are indications that you are drawing closer to the grave.” This sounds funny by when you think about it, it is true. My preference for quiet birthdays in recent times do not imply I sit the whole days and reflect on my death. Mostly on my birthdays, I eat cake, go to dinner or make dinner myself and eat with the family and the newest activity is to generally spend time reflecting and praying.

In these quiet moments, I begin to appreciate what God has done for me in the past year and I start to look forward to the new year (age). One of the areas that I cannot thank God enough is how much I have grown – not in physical terms – but in maturity and within my spirit. I have learned to be appreciative of who I am as an individual, what I stand for and where God wants me to be. I have learned to be comfortable in my skin and to enjoy my own company. I am more forgiving. I can withstand very challenging situations without giving up on my faith (which wasn’t so in the past) and I love myself more.

On this day as I celebrate a little over three decades of life on earth, it is my prayer that God continues to preserve my life as He takes me through another 365 days of getting to know Him some more.

How do you normally celebrate your birthdays? Has it changed over time? Do share.

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#WBC2020 – How I met my Husband while Covering an Event

Saturdays are meant for relaxing especially if you’re a student at the University and a volunteer for a campus radio station. You always looked forward to the weekend to prepare and eat good meals, catch up on your sleep as well as spend time with your roommates. Other students preferred to go home so I wasn’t particularly excited when our news editor asked me to go cover a programme. The programme was being organised by medical students who had offered biological science but were currently offering medicine. The event, that day, was meant to mentor biological science students/medical-school hopefuls on how they could also get into medical school.

Looking at the weather, which was warm and all the sacrifices I was making in order to be at that programme that Saturday afternoon, I was not enthused at all.

At the event, which had a good attendance, I found a place to sit, brought out my recorder, pen and notebook and started taking notes. Whenever I raised my head, I saw the MC of the event looking straight at me. I started frowning and it seemed I did that throughout the event but I made sure to gather my story.

The programme was enlightening even for me who was not a medical-school hopeful. It ended with participants gathering to take photos. I gathered my tools and started to leave when the MC approached me to introduce himself. The same guy that got me frowning throughout the entire event. He asked whether I wanted to stay for refreshment and my answer was no. I thanked him and wished him the best.

Before leaving, I stopped to speak to another medical student who was my classmate from senior secondary school. I had interviewed him a week (on another show) prior to this event. I promised to keep in touch.

How excited I was to be walking back to my hostel to go enjoy the rest of my Saturday.

About a week later, I received a call from an unknown number and when I answered it was the MC of the event I had attended.

“I got your number from …. I saw you speaking to him after the programme and I knew how I could contact you.”

I was shocked even when my classmate from senior high had given me prior notice that he was giving my phone number to the MC. I did not frown. This time, I was very polite and we spoke for a few minutes, basically introducing ourselves and we hanged up. He started calling every Saturday to “check up on me.”

Initially (and erroneously), I thought medical students had no social life and perhaps, this guy wanted a friend in a different circle. That was the main reason I decided to be friends with him. Another reason was because he just listened. He’d call, ask one question and I would talk and talk.

The calls became more frequent. He could even call and say he was going for a wedding.🤷🏿‍♀️

We became good friends and one thing led to the other and the rest they say is history. Actually, we are married now and we’ve been married for almost five years and met at the event in October, 2010.

***This is 20/22 of the #WinterABC2020. The prompt is to share about a life-changing event you once attended.***

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#WBC2020 – A Different Kind of Year

Unpredictability, anxiety, fear, anguish

The emotions most of us feel in 2020

Pandemic, deaths and earthquakes

Individuals are wondering what else 2020 will present

Will it ever end?

Leap years are most terrible

A new notion people are gradually accepting

Nothing seems certain

Resolutions have been put on hold

Fingers have been crossed and each day being taken at a time

Prayers are being said for this plague to pass

We are vulnerable individuals walking on the surface of the earth

If the Creator decides to pull the very ground that we are walking on, there is absolutely nothing we can do

2020 is showing the lapses in every aspect of our lives including in leadership and governance

In all of these, we are being strengthened in our faith.

Clearly showing we are indeed nothing without God’s protection.

What are you holding on to in this period?

***This is 17/22 of the #WinterABC2020. The prompt is to comment on a trending current affairs topic.***

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#WinterABC – Becoming Delali

Living with mum’s relatives, at the age of six, taught me to avoid trouble by all means. When I was told to sit, I sat. I woke up to mop the floors and do the dishes without complaining. When I was once beaten because I returned home late from playing with my friends, I stopped playing entirely. What is the point of playing anyway? I was told a girl’s place was in the kitchen and she needed to be out of bed by 6am. Who was I to argue? I stopped turning the TV on when I returned from school but headed straight to the kitchen. Jonny Quest, Scooby Doo and Dexter’s Lab held no meaning to my childhood any longer.

Most of the kids in my neighbourhood lived with their parents. They attended the best schools, were dropped off in the mornings and picked up by their parents from school. They wore very nice dresses and their parents also bought storybooks for them. They were generous and shared their books with me. I was introduced to the Wakefield Twins in Sweet Valley (from kids to University), Goosebumps and the Babysitters Club. These books took my imaginations to several places and I loved that. At least, I was not beaten by mum’s relatives for reading.

Ironically, one of my most vivid memories from Senior High School was receiving lashes because I was engrossed in a romantic novel while sitting in an Agric. Science class. Novels still do that me. They help me forget all that is happening around me.

I was once very certain I wanted to be an author. That passion changed to journalism but after working for my University’s radio station for three years, I concluded that gathering stories and the crazy work schedules of broadcasters were not things I enjoyed. 🤷🏿‍♀️

I’m glad I was introduced to God at a very early stage. I enjoyed going to church and I still enjoy it. I’m certain God has a purpose that He’s fulfilling in my life. I never have clear plans of what I want or where I want to be but making time to listen to Him daily keeps the two of us on the same page.

I have made tons of mistakes and failed at some many things but the survivor instincts I possess push me to get things right the second time.

What is your story? Share with us!

***This is 4/22 of the #WinterABC2020. The prompt is Becoming (your name) a biographical piece.***

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How a Typical Lock down Day Looks

2 am? It’s not even morning yet. I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep. I remember the number of covid-19 cases Ghana has recorded and if there is anything I can personally do about that.

4:44 am? I wake up fully, pick my phone again and send out devotionals to my church’s Whatsapp group pages. I forward links of my pastor’s audio broadcast while contemplating on what do next – Facebook, Twitter, Whatsapp, WordPress?

5:30 am? I have wasted some time on those social media pages. Where is the YouVersion? I read the verse of the day, share that to my social media platforms and read several of the devotionals they offer and pray. YouVersion is awesome. Remember to check it out if you haven’t.

7 am? Mostly I would have taken my bath and in the kitchen listening to the radio while thinking of what to have for breakfast – pancakes, puff-puff or something easier to prepare.

8 am? Little girl wakes up and that is when my day really begins since I virtually have to force her to do everything – brushing her teeth, bathing, eating. That takes so much of my energy and I can’t wait for school to resume.

10 am? I’m supposed to be working from home so I sit behind the laptop and turn the TV on for the little girl. On good days, I am able to complete tasks. On bad days, I just lie down or play WordCross or read to the little girl or fix puzzles with her or watch Paw Patrol or Peppa Pig or Abby Hatcher (I’m tired of seeing these cartoons).

1 pm-2 pm? I prepare lunch which mostly serves as supper for me.

3 pm? Depending on how productive I have been, I pick the laptop and still try to do some real work from home. Intermittently, I check to see who has posted anything for the lock down blog challenge. I read as and when I find the time.

8 pm? I work on the blog for the day. I sometimes send and read emails for work at this time. This is the most conducive time to do anything productive since my little girl would have had her supper and bath and either preparing to go or will already be in bed. Implying no interruptions and more productivity.

10 – 11 pm? Sleeping and praying time.

Weekends or Weekdays? I can’t really tell because the days are all the same now. The only difference is that I still laundry on Saturdays.

**18th post of the 21 day lock down blog challenge and the writing prompt is: Take us through a day in lockdown**

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The Silence of Her Words

She had dreadlocks, dressed casually and wore glasses. Her background was in communications and planning and she seemed confident.

“This is the back end of the organisation’s website. This is how to post new content,” she said.

I got highly interested and researched on blogs. I created a personal account on WordPress and that was the beginning of a passion. I served as her assistant for about a year and when social media was not very common, she stressed on the need to tweet for the organisation.

She gave me the responsibility of producing weekly updates for the project’s blog and pushed me to take bigger assignments that I thought I was incapable of. She had a personal blog too and it was featured on one of the biggest websites in New York.

As a young University graduate who had just completed her voluntary National Service, I was intrigued by her. She provided me with a picture of my ambitions. She believed in my abilities when I did not know they existed.

Seven years on and I seem to have followed in her footprint somehow. It wasn’t the words of her advice but her silence, faith and actions were exactly what I needed at that time.

**17th post of the 21 day lock down blog challenge and the writing prompt is: Share the best advice you have ever received.**

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The Real Struggle of Pastry-Making

My second attempt at this and it must go well. That is never the case with pastry making – your second, third and fourth attempts could be worse than your first and you’ll never know what went wrong.

You may have listened and watched all the tutorials, listed and purchased all the ingredients that goes with the recipe but boom – the results could be disastrous. Trying new meals could be an adventure but pastry-making could be a ride on a roller coaster. Brace yourself because anything can happen.

My second attempt at making puff-puff (a popular West African deep fried snack) and I felt I was properly armed this time. I called the commander-in-chief (my sister) who run me though the recipe again (for the purpose of revision). I made mental notes. I had no idea my brain was this sharp. I was able to memorise everything she told me without writing them down – flour, sugar, nutmeg, salt, margarine, flavour, yeast and baking powder. Mix dry ingredients. Mix the liquid ones. Put dry and liquid ingredients together and ‘beat it’ to introduce some air. If it’s too thick, add a little water and make it sit for about an hour. Cover it!

Truly, after an hour, the dough or batter had raised. Oil in pan, I allowed it to heat before dropping the spongy dough into it. That thing turned brown by soaking almost half of my oil. They came out looking like some soggy compact disks. Not today, I said to myself. Probably I did not give it enough time to raise. I allowed the mixture to sit for an additional hour and poured the oil into another pan. It was probably the pan. It did not make the puff-puff round. I heated the oil again and started dipping the dough into the oil. The results was even worse than the first.

I turned off the fire and called the commander -in-chief (my sister) after I had sent her photos of the disaster I was making in the kitchen.

“Did you allow it to raise,” she asked.

“It’s been sitting in that kitchen for two hours now,” I said.

“Sieve more flour into the batter. You probably made it too watery,” she diagnosed.

That was how I added more flour and fried again and this time, they actually came out looking a little rounder. I am not a failure after all.

Not the perfect puff-puff but a good attempt (in my opinion)

It’s amazing how this snack is common in our markets but very difficult for me to figure out how it is made. This lock down period has shown me how challenging it is to make pastries/snacks. The least mistake you and you’ll be preparing an inedible nameless substance.

**16th post of the 21 day lock down blog challenge and the writing prompt is: Document your experience trying something new or giving something up.**

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3 Tips to Buying the Best Gift

Happy Easter to everyone. Our Saviour is risen and there isn’t a much better time to write about gifts and generosity than now. Gifts are the items we give out. We could give kitchen wares, food items, underwear, clothes, money, time and our expertise among others to our family, friends, neighbours, the church and the needy.

How to acquire the best gifts

  1. It is easier to acquire gifts to individuals that we are in touch with, especially, if they are our friends and acquaintances. Through regular conversations, they may drop hints on items they like and from our own observations, we may conclude on what they prefer. My top tip to acquiring a gift is to buy an item that the person likes and not what you (the buyer) prefers.
  2. In order to buy the best gift item, do a little bit of research on the individual, especially if you are not close to them. You may love perfumes but the person you may acquiring the gift for may be allergic to them. You may prefer cakes but the person taking it hates it. Don’t surprise yourself but do a little background search before hitting the shop. The easiest gift to give anyone, currently, is money. No one (I may be wrong) rejects monetary gifts, no matter how little you may feel it is. You can add, “please use it to buy airtime” and they’ll be appreciative of your gesture.
  3. Speaking about gifts, the attitude you put up while giving also matters. Don’t give because you feel pressured. Don’t break the bank to acquire a gift for anyone. Give and expect nothing in return.

There are a lot of people in our neighbourhoods who are really struggling, especially , in this lock down period. They are the ones we need to identify and stretch a helping hand towards. Happy giving!

**14th post of the 21 day lock down blog challenge and the writing prompt is: Gift Ideas…What not to buy someone of the opposite sex.**

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My 5 Most Frequently Asked Questions

  • Her: Mummy, where are you going?

When she sees me dressed up.

  • Her: Mummy, where are we going?

When I insist we all take our baths in the morning.

  • Her: Mummy, are we going to school?

My response: Do you want to go to school?

Her response: No. I don’t want to go to school. I want to stay at home and watch cartoons.

  • Her: Mummy, is it night?

One of the favourite questions of somebody who cannot read the clock.

  • Her: Mummy, are you tired?

As if there is something she can do about it.

These questions are posed by my three-year old daughter. She is the one I spend most of the day with since her dad is a health worker who still goes to the hospital in this lock down period. Who do you spend most of your time with in this lock down period?

**13th post of the 21 day lock down blog challenge and the writing prompt is: Frequently Asked Question.**

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A Special Good Friday

Reminiscing over how we celebrated Good Friday several decades ago
Where we wore mourning clothes and went to church with tears in our eyes
Kneeling before the crucifix and giving it a kiss
Back at home, we did nothing but watched the enactment of the death of the Saviour.
We stayed away from red meat (whatever that meant).

Today's Good Friday was different
The weather was cloudy as it seems to be every year
Sounds of slow tuned Christ-centered music was played on the radio
While some discussed the president's address promising citizens free electricity in this Covid-19 era
No physical church service this year

I did enjoy my quiet time though
Probably the highlight of my day
Initially planned to read about the death of the Saviour to commemorate this day but read Mark 7 instead
The first part of the chapter criticizes those who choose traditions, rules and regulations over a personal relationship with God
While admonishing us to be more weary of what we bring out as its impact is greater

The Pharisees upheld their practice of hand and feet washing
And giving ostensibly to the poor
The modern Christian may be like the Pharisees
Pretending to love while our hearts are distant from God
Perhaps that is the reason the earth is now on a reset mode,
providing us with a chance to reflect on our deeds and practices. 

It's been a special good Friday. 

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