Help! My Resolution to Get Married Never Materialises – Worried Lady

Hello CBG¹,

I am 34 years old, gainfully employed but tired of making new resolutions particularly in the area of settling down. In previous years, I made every conscious effort to get married. I have even written down what I would like to see in my dream man. I go through that list every day and I pray for him, but, it’s been six long unsuccessful years of searching for that ‘dream man.’ I am really tired and have decided not to make any resolutions regarding that subject this year. Since you’ve been preaching about planning and making resolutions, what do you advise I do? Should I still make resolutions and get disappointed or simply relax and see what God will do?

– A very worried lady

CBG’s Response

Hello Miss,

Marriage, as an institution, was created by God and His idea for the majority of people. Not everyone will get married, though, but as long as it is in your heart to be married then it is part of what grace has made available to you. The provisions that are given under grace does not work in isolation but work in tandem with faith. Faith is what causes you to receive the things that grace has already made available. Thus, if you say you made a resolution the previous year to be married and it didn’t materialise so you wouldn’t be deliberate about that subject anymore then I’m afraid you are never going to get married. What you need to do is to keep praying and remain visible to the circle of men in your various levels of socialization. Package yourself nicely while keeping the vision and desire alive. Once the vision and desire exist and as long as it is a provision under grace, then it means it is within your reach and you need to lay hold of it by faith. Faith is dead if it is not accomplished with works. The Bible says that if the clouds are full of rain, they empty themselves (Ecclesiastes 11:3). Keep doing what you are doing, remain visible, continue praying and eventually, you’ll find somebody.

Note: In case you were not deliberate about this subject previously, plan to be more visible this year. If your location does not necessarily get you exposed to meeting a man, then you need to go to places where you’ll meet them. Getting to those places will be influenced by your values and the idea of a man who’d like to get married to. It’s good to know you have a perception of who your dream man is but if you find yourself in the wrong places, you’d definitely meet the wrong people. Ensure you go to the right places and are in the right environment so you meet the person you want to be married to. Ruth was deliberate and she met Boaz (Ruth 2).

All the best and remember to invite us to your wedding. ☺️

Do you have any piece of advice to share with this lady? Post it in the comment box.

CBG¹: Christian Blog Ghana

Feature Image Source: Pixabay

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Pause. Evaluate January 

Development experts spend quite a substantial amount of their resources on monitoring and evaluation when executing a project. In fact, they hire officers in charge of this unique area even before the project starts. Why not at the end? This is because they do not underestimate the role of monitoring and evaluation. Measuring their successes and failures as they go through a project ensures they are charting the right course and perhaps, saves them more resources. If we determined to make good use of this new year, we can as well take a cue from the development experts – monitor and evaluate our progress with our various goals monthly.

Pause. Let’s go back to January 1. It’s been 30 amazing days already. How have you fared? Have you started working on your resolutions yet? Are you spending more time in prayer and reading the word? Are you working on acquiring that new skill, reading those books already or building yourself up in a specific capacity? Are you practicing that good saving habit? How about that new business? Have you started working on the proposal? If you haven’t started, it’s not too late to put down some goals, of course, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Don’t allow the year to pass by without you placing some demand on God, the Father.

One practice the Bible encourages is the writing down of our visions as stated in Habakkuk 2:2,

Then the LORD replied: “Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets …

There are certain ideas and dreams that God has laid in our hearts. You may choose to call them resolutions, goals, dreams, ambitions or aspirations, but, take a paper or your phone, state them and include how the Holy Spirit has directed you to work towards them. You can only know the mind of the spirit when you spend time praying quality prayers.

This month, we learnt that the Holy Spirit makes everything possible for believers, hence, it is important to involve God in our plans. We also learned that whatever you ingest is what we bring out as Christians, therefore, we should be wary of what we allow into our senses. Let’s learn to build ourselves up by taking in the right stuff – which will help us achieve our bigger goals. It could be reading more books or watching videos that can build our intellect.

Take some time and cast your mind back to the beginning of the year and take an assessment. Do you like how you’ve spent the month? If you do, keep it up! If not, let’s involve God and work towards the various ministries that God has before us.

It’s been a great start but we trust that God has more in store for us. Let’s hold Him by His word!