Guest Post: Pornography. Me. The Church

I love guest posting, I think I am more confident on other people’s blogs than I am on mine. Even though I talk about deep issues on my blog, I think I talk deeper issues in other people’s blogs.

Now, the post: I am a Christian woman, born and raised in a Christian family and was addicted to pornography. I wrote a little bit about it in my book, because I didn’t have the confidence to talk more about it. I was introduced to it when I was very young, in my teens. It became a close companion when I was in the university, that stage when I did not know how to deal with my emotions and sexual desires. After graduating from college, I reached a point where I made a conscious decision to fight it, and so every day, I woke up and prayed to God for help to win the war over this temptation. Currently, I have set my Twitter page in such a way that no inappropriate content appears in my feed because that could trigger unwanted desires. I am always, and consciously on the watch, praying to God to give me strength in this weakness, yet I battle it alone in silence and behind closed doors, like many other Christians.

Now that you know about pornography and me, let’s get to pornography and the church.

In this day and age, where we are loud, open and very bold, you might think we will be talking about this issue. You would think we will be open now that 64% of the people watching porn are between the ages of 13-24 (Barna Group Survey) and the church would know that not just 21 million men are addicted to porn but women and kids are also on this new drug.

Sin is not picky; it goes with anyone who falls for it and as we are being taught in the church to save ourselves for marriage but not being told how we can fight or deal with our hormones, emotions, sexual temptations and desires, we are left in guilt and fight this sin in secrecy. I personally want to advise pastors to talk about this issue because the times are changing but holiness isn’t. Holiness is still the goal and without it no one can see the Father, therefore, pastors need to talk about this openly and make themselves less judgmental and more accepting to the people who watch porn. They should receive and help these people because we, as the body of Christ, all get hurt when one is hurt.

Here are some helpful tips that I use to fight pornography and I know it’ll be useful to you too:

  • Talk to a friend about it and let her/ him keep you accountable
  • Like all other sins, pornography feels good when you are viewing it and then, you feel dirty and guilty later. After sometime, you thirst again for the water that leaves you thirsty still. What I have done is to write down all the ways pornography makes me feel, and how I would feel leaving it, and I have a vision of the woman that I want to be in the future, and how she is affected by the addiction now. This can be posted on the wall as a reminder and to encourage you in your fight.
  • Follow Christian blogs and read books about freedom from pornography addiction (I would recommend some on my blog).
  • Put some sort of control on your phone (I personally use parental control where a friend can act like my parent and get notified when I search anything related to porn, and it blocks my searches and so nothing shows up).
  • Tell your pastor and parents (I am yet to do this too).
  • Write in your journal about your struggles.
  • Connect with others and keep each other accountable.
  • Some things cannot end without prayer and fasting regardless of your level of discipline, and so, pray and fast. I personally have heard testimonies of different people who have been healed by God miraculously, or even slowly from pornography addiction and so I still have hope that there is healing for even me… and You.     

(Now that I have shared this, I think I will be brave enough to talk about this in my blog).   

This is a guest post submitted by Eunice Tossy. Eunice is a 24-year old Tanzanian blogger who is still learning and growing. She shares her experiences on her blog, http://abiblegirl.com/ . You can follow her on Twitter and Instagram : @eunietj and on YouTube: Eunice Tossy.